Entitlement mentality. Are you entitled?

Me, me, me

Hii guys!
Welcome back to my blog.
Today I’ll be discussing entitlement mentality and I plan to shake some tables😁 I saw a movie a few days ago and at a point in the movie, the main character was very upset that her mother-in-law decided to give a large percentage of her fortune to charity instead of giving everything to her son who is the main character’s husband. She was so upset and went to fight and insult the mother-in-law. You’d have thought that she worked for the money. I sat there wondering why she felt so entitled and I decided to write about it.

• What is entitlement mentality?
An entitlement mentality is a state of mind in which an individual comes to believe that privileges are instead rights, and that they are to be expected as a matter of course.

Okay let’s take it from the basic unit of society – family.
In some places, it is expected that the richest person in the family takes care of everyone.
This makes some relatives believe it’s your responsibility to send their kids to school since you are rich.
Please sir, leave uncle Calistus alone. You cannot expect him to send all your kids to school and still give you money for upkeep every month. If he decides to do it, all right but if not, find a solution. You gave birth to your children not uncle Calistus.

Have you ever had someone slide in your DMs to ask you for money? 🤔
You’re still trying to figure out who the person is and how he/she got your digits and the next thing they start to tell you a story of how they are stranded and need you to send them some money.

Money is usually given in exchange for adding value and most people don’t understand this. Some people believe that you “owe” them things because you are properly dressed and it seems like you have a lot of money.
They’ll be like “auntie good morning o! Anything for the boys?” You smile and give some money, but the day you decide not to give anything, you become a stingy and wicked person. You’ll think they worked for the money!
Now, I’m not saying it is wrong to give. I know religion preaches compassion, kindness and all of that. The Quran talks about it as well but the Quran also says you shouldn’t stretch your hands to the utmost limit lest you’ll be blamed.

People also tend to be entitled when they are in relationships.
Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, girl likes boy and they decide to date. A day after they start dating, she says she needs a new phone and not just any phone now, she wants the latest iPhone. 2 weeks later, she wants a macbook, a month later she wants Peruvian hair. Now, if the guy decides to buy these things for her on his own free will, then no problem. But don’t go about thinking it is his duty to do these things for you and don’t go screaming and telling whoever cares to listen that he is a stingy and selfish person because he refused to buy you Peruvian hair or an iPhone. If he buys it for you, see it as a privilege not an obligation. I mean, how were you surviving before you met him?
Calm down bros😂. I can see you shouting yes and nodding your head.

Stop eet😂

What do you think you’re doing when you start to expect sex from her because you bought her a present last week? Thinking that giving a lady money automatically entitles you to her body is very wrong. You might as well go pick up a sex worker by the road side.
Relating sex in a relationship as a right is absolutely wrong. If she decides to have sex with you, see it as a privilege not a right.

Sometimes, we see people in need and decide to help them. But these people then become entitled over time and think it is your obligation to do those things for them.
I give Mr Ade a loaf of bread today, tomorrow he asks for a crate of eggs, 2 days later, he asks for a carton of beer.

We have to realise that the world owes us nothing and start focusing on what we can do to help ourselves.

No one owes you their attention and if they decide to give it to you, see it as a privilege.

Don’t believe that your needs and wants are more important than others and that they should be met at all cost even at the expense of other people’s needs and wants.


There are many causes of entitlement mentality;
One cause is arrogance. There are some people who believe they worth so much and that you have to give them whatever they ask you for because they deserve it.
Another cause is upbringing. Some people are brought up with all their needs met and this makes the believe that they can have what they want at any point in time without putting in any effort whatsoever.


To overcome entitlement mentality, we need to be content with what we have. Now don’t get me wrong. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t strive for more, it means we should be grateful for the little we have.
We need to be able to accept our reality.
Another way is to “give more to get more.” In other words, what you take is what you give. Do things that will make people want to do things for you.


Feeling entitled is something we do without realizing sometimes. I know I have been guilty of it on numerous occasions but we learn everyday right?
We have to pay attention to our behaviour and learn, unlearn and relearn when the need arises.
I hope we take time to access ourselves and make changes when necessary.
Till next time guys😊
Stay safe.
.
A’ishah.

PS: the name of the movie I was talking about is golden garden. It’s a Korean series 😁